I penetrate you

by SF

pen·e·trate pronunciation: “pe-n& -“trAt”, Function: verb. Inflected Form(s): –trat·ed; -trat·ing. Etymology: L penetrate, past participle of penetrate, from penitus deep within, far; akin to Latin penus provisions.

to pass into or through
to affect profoundly with feeling
to diffuse through or into
to affect deeply the senses or feelings

I therefore penus-mock you all – and your preferences.

Your ought-to-be penetrator penusproposes, and has a bunch of crime books for you:

for those who in enjoyment terms prefer an alpha
I remember noting Mr Henry Blabson Jr’s ” I Cum at Nites”: his latest offering is-and I say this with all the humility of a jaded critic – one of the funniest books I’ve read in a long time. Witty, refreshing, satirizing. Ah, ha, I can hear one of my putative critics exclaiming, but has he a plot, has he a crime, is it thrilling? Yes, to the first two questions. A question mark answer to the third : what do you mean by thrilling? For me, it was a splendidly enjoyable book, but to be honest – even if it hurts – this book, like so many others these decadent days ( or is it merely that I’m getting older? ), begins to fall apart towards the end : not much, but after all I’m paid by “Fenquin” to criticize.
( “Robocop was Here” by Henry Blabson Jr. Hickups-on-Thames, €25. )

for those who prefer a beta double plus
I have been less enthusiastic about some of Mr Bingoman’s books in the past. I should now like to redress the balance. This thriller indeed, is quite different from Mr Bingoman’s usual. A clever plot, well-constructed and not falling apart either at the seams or at the tail-piece, with several well-concealed tricks up its sleeve, and a handsome gallery of characters, ensure that this is a highly readable book. I do not always go for Mr Bingoman’s style but “Double Tristesse” impressed and intrigued me and I give it a strong recommendation. More please, Mr. B.
( “Double Tristesse” by Collin Bingoman. Hickory-on-Thames, €19,99 )

for readers prefering lethal sex
A collection of stories by women crime writers. If you can bear to read on after the awful, arch introduction –“Honestlly, girls, I’m not really terrified of you, en masse” As I say, you will find it a cosy collection of chilly little pieces…..Nothing really outstanding here, but all perfectly readable; suitable for a short, jerky train journey or a bedtime book when very weary.
( “Lethal Stomatic Sex” Jerky Crime Club Anthology, €62,50 )

for your mid-summer reading list
A detective. An amateur millionaire archaeologist. South of France. Rhapsodic passages on skin-diving. The crime and suspects get sorted out. Quite amusing, quite able, quite readable: but maybe the sub-aquatic world lacks the oxygen to set the plot afire. Good-average, and probably rather pleasant. Thanks for sharing Mr Asmouth.
(“Diving to a Lost Paradise” by Dieter Asmouth. Dotmond, €12,50 )

with it, in your favourite armchair
Another archaeologist, an American professional this time, specializing in the middle east, gets involved in the mayhem following a Levantine coup d’ ?t. Sad, asthmatic, unsuccessful academically. Marriage beyond repair, the hero somehow emerges sympathetically.Reserves of energy and courage. A by no means uninteresting book, worthy of a fireside hour in your favourite armchair.
(“The Perpendicular Orange” by Amie Dingwood. Eyre & Ffenguin, €17,99 )

I suspect readers under thirty don’t read this sort of
detective story anyway. It’s their loss. The new Gnnnaio Sharkk is cheerfully and excellently done, with some nice, loathsome characters and some nice, nice ones. Mr Mpyske Anemones, writer of letters of condolence to the bereaved, and prospective author of Etiquette, is an excellent, excellent Sharkkk character; so is the dog, the manservant, Max, and Desir? Lady Clanningham. The cast has a pleasantly D.G.F.Wooderwoodhouse flavour but the book is none the worse for that and, if the wit has a slightly arch, old-fashioned flavour, it makes it all cosier for readers over thirty.
(“Legs-in-Gloves” by Gnnnaio Sharkkk.Casselburger,€28,88)

Pause : Now, come to think of it. I care a lot about minorities. I don’t want to brag about it, but I donate, in regular basis, my paintings to Amnesty International. Yes, I do care.

I haven’t forgotten minorities. So, here goes.

to the stubborn, eccentric few, who could, but will not, employ a butler!
A good, fast-moving, Ambler-type thriller set in a South American state. Amusing and ingenious. Full of whodunits. Borgnen who figured in a previous whodunit, and his team in a highly skilful and complex brew of organized crime and mystery. A good plot. All thoroughly well exploited : a workmanlike book. You should guess whodunit – and there’s no butler.
( “Double Cross in Rio Madre” by Eugene O’ Hair. Millenium234, €65.00)Â